Just Throwing It Out There

When I first started this blog, I wasn’t sure where it was going to go. If I’m being honest, the whole thing was my dad’s idea. Being the completely unbiased father that he is, he’s a sucker for anything I write. I think he was kind of sad I wasn’t writing college papers for him to edit anymore and he didn’t want me to lose my touch. 

So, I started this blog that kind of, sort of reflects the journalistic background I graduated with. Only now, I am the creator, editor, and writer of the thing. I decide what’s worth putting on the blog and what isn’t.

I wanted a space for “good news only.” A place that wouldn’t be crowded with sadness, politics, pointing fingers and violence, but instead a glimmer of hope.

I knew this wasn’t going to be anything huge and expected a small following of family and friends, which is pretty much what I got. I wrote some great stories that I’m extremely proud of. I think my favorite part is the outpouring of kindness in comments and emails. People truly relate to what I write and that’s a pretty cool feeling. I’m glad I started this and I’m glad I decide to renew my website subscription each year, even though the amount of content I publish is far and few.

Once I moved to California and started working full time, this passion project kind of died off. I blamed it on work, starting a new life, and exploring my new home. I was “too busy.” When I did have a story to work on, it actually stressed me out as it sat at the end of my to-do list for months.

I think somewhere along the way, it wasn’t just that I was “too busy,” but that my voice and authenticity started to fade in my writing. I walked into someone’s story with a purpose or a theme that had to be positive. Creating something with an agenda takes away from the raw feelings that are a natural part of everyone’s story.

People struggle. And it’s really hard. Not every story has a happy ending or a silver lining, and that’s okay. It took me a while to realize that. Not every story has to be tied nicely with a bow and a “lesson-learned” theme smacking you in the face at the end.

And I’m not saying the stories I wrote were like that. I asked people to be honest with me and share things that were not easy to share. Some of the people I interviewed even cried as we spoke. I know it sounds awkward, but when another human trusts you with their thoughts, feelings and experiences, it’s really breathtaking. It was an honor to listen and be responsible for crafting their stories.

I guess what I’m saying is, I don’t want this blog to be something on my to-do list. I want it to be something I enjoy and a place to share things because that is how people connect - through sharing and listening and relating to one another.

So, maybe going forward I won’t have a superstar story to share with you every time. Maybe it’ll just be me – a wise 26-year-old that takes too many pictures of her dog and just won’t stop writing about her feelings.

Stay tuned.